I got inked!

I got this tattoo last month, and am finally getting around to blogging about it now:

I LOVE it! I've wanted a tattoo for years, but never knew what I would want to live with, forever. Then I realized that I wanted an ankle bracelet with a heart shaped charm that had and "A" and an "E" in it (for my daughters!). Inspiration struck, and through several twists of fate, I was lucky enough to end up with Steve from Anchor Ink, downtown SLC.

Steve owns the company, and knew exactly what I wanted: Something feminine, badass, and meaningful, all the same time. I gave him my ideas, and he ended up with this. I love it, and know I will, forever!

Can't think of a title for this one

There are people who come in to your life, that I consider to be "Once in a Lifetime Friends". These are the people that you know you are lucky to know. The friends who love you no matter what, and that you love, no matter what. Friends that you may go years between speaking to, but when you do, you pick up right where you left off. Friends that you look at in awe, because you know just how lucky you are to know them. What's even more amazing, is that they want to be friends with you, too!

I've been so lucky to have such a friend. I've posted about her before, she's known on the Degenerate Elite as Patsy. She's always been supportive of my blog and leaves her great personality spattered throughout the comments.

Patsy is the most funky and fun person I know. She is the epitome of ultra hip, even without trying to be. She's always been, in my mind, the type of person who is the best at whatever she does. Whether it's cleaning her house, painting a portrait, drawing a charcoal ape, flirting with boys, baking a chocolate cake from scratch, singing, doing her hair and makeup, doing friends hair and makeup, swimming the butterfly stroke, playing the flute, drawing charicatures of just about anything, or harvesting the bones out of a corpse. Yes, that too. Her talents reach far and wide. And truly, she is the best at whatever it is. The spectacularly amazing part about this, is that she's so damn humble about it. She doesn't think she's the best, she just is.

Patsy listens to me without judgement. She has allowed me to return that favor by confiding in me as well. She has always offered an understanding and open heart, and has a way to find the humor in any situation. I've seen her face the harshest of lifes realities, and she handles everything with incredible dignity and grace. She is, without question, someone that I am damn lucky to know. It's crazy for me to remember a time that I avoided her presence (stupid high school drama!)

Patsy is facing the toughest challenge of her life right now. Her darling husband, her best friend and her soul mate, has been diagnosed with a very aggressive form of mestatic melanoma. His doctors have given him two months, but every day it seems to get a little more scary for them.

I was just at Patsy's house last month. I spoke to her husband, and held their 7 month old baby. This baby is the first baby that I've ever held that has given me those baby hunger pains. She is so sweet, and so loved. Patsy and her husband went through their own personal hells (he has fought cancer before, and was just told that he beat it. She went through a horrible divorce), and found each other 5 1/2 years ago. They are so in love, so happy, and have built a wonderful life together and finally had their dreams come true of having a beautiful daughter. Then they get this devistating blow.

This is where I need my blog friends and readers... if any of you have any experiences with this kind of cancer, let me know and I'll give you the link to their blog where you can offer support and/or encouragement. If you'd like to see their blog and I know you, send me an email and I'll give you the link. Otherwise, please, whatever it is you do to have miracles performed, can you please keep this family as part of your practice? If you meditate, pray, positive thoughts, vibes, whatever... please keep my friends in your hearts.

All of my love to Patsy and her family.

The Great and Dreadful Day

For nearly 6 years I've been looking forward to this day. I remember hearing and seeing other moms talk about how this day brought them heartache and sadness, and I thought they were silly. There has to be everything in the world to look forward to on this day. This day marks the entry into freedom, growth, space, and overall happiness. Those other moms were just saying it made them sad, to make them feel like a better mom.

Then, it happened to me. What is it, you ask? Today, I began the process of registering my daughters.... for Kindergarten.

*sigh*

For the most part, I am happy and not sad. I've always been a working mom and have had guilt over the fact that I'm not at home with them each and every day. On the other hand, I selfishly love my independance and freedom while I work, and love being "Christy" for 8 hours every day. However, there is not a minute that passes, where I don't think about my blonde haired, blue eyed beauties. One of my daughters, Alexa, asked me once what I do when I get sad and miss them. I told her that I have pictures of them all over my walls at work, so when I get sad I can just look at them, think about how cute they are and how much I love them, and get happy. Then, she asked me to give her a picture of me so that she can do the same thing.

These two girls have been the loves of my life. There are times that I get frustrated and lose my patience to embarrassing levels, but I've never know more beautiful, intelligent, funny, sweet, kind, and caring individuals. I have seen them stand up for each other "No mom, you are NOT taking her to the doctor to get shots. Take me!" , "It's okay if Alexa gets the last pair of spiderman socks today. I want to see her look cool!" (yes, they love spiderman and love their spiderman socks) , "Emilie, I love how you look when you're running in your sandals and wear capri's". These two angels are best little friends, friendly to others, sensitive, and inclusive. I couldn't ask to know, let alone raise, two better human beings. I am so lucky.

Just today, Emilie told me that she loves me to death and can't even stop hugging me. Alexa told me that she wishes she had a really big bum so that everyone can smell it. We all laughed, giggled, and snuggled.

In two weeks, they will start kindergarten. My perfect girls. They're not going to be the smartest in their class, they're going to be perfectly in the middle. They're going to make lots of new friends and dazzle their teacher(s). There is no doubt that for the rest of their life, they're going to be known as "The Twins". They'll have noteriety and popularity without trying, but I think they'll set a good example of how to be. I didn't ask for twins, I didn't hope for twins, but I wouldn't have it any other way.

I just can't believe how fast time has flown. In another 6 years, they'll almost be 12. Unfathomable. I love my sweethearts more than life itself. I'm so lucky!

Still, selfishly, I am looking forward to kindergarten. Mostly, I can't wait to see how their minds grow!

Vegas Baby, yeah!

I'm off for a weekend of sin and debauchery. I would return and report, but you know how it goes.... what happens in Las Vegas, STAYS in Las Vegas!

Huh.

Last night I made a very long, overly detailed post about part IV of my relationship examination process. I posted it, shut down my computer, and got ready for bed. By the time I was done with my routine, I realized that I didn't like the vulnerable and exposed feeling I had. I didn't realize that publicly talking about my past relationships would bother me, but this time it did. Perhaps it spotlighted my faults in an all too real manner. Perhaps I realized that I haven't changed as much as I thought I have. Perhaps I'm pissed that all of the pain I experienced still hurts a little.

At any rate, I'm not able to talk about it anymore. The post was up for about a half hour, I think a few people already saw it.