Thursday, November 16, 2006

Make new friends, but keep the old

Yesterday I heard from a former college roommate of mine. I'll refer to her as Patsy, even though that's not her real name. If she reads this, she'll know I'm referring to her and what the reference is. She's the Patsy to my Eddie (From Ab Fab). Patsy was quite possibly the coolest roommate a girl could have, and the only roommate that I make any effort to keep in touch with... even though at times we go months or even years between speaking. She's good people.

Patsy's little sister found my myspace profile and sent it to her. I have not had the chance to talk to Patsy about my disaffection before, and I'm quite open about it on myspace-- even though I don't use myspace anymore, and only used it very little in the past.

Patsy called me yesterday and said "I ran across your myspace profile... what's up??" I gave a high level overview of what happened, and where we are now. I was a little scared to talk to her about it. Her first marriage was to a Jewish man and her family all but disowned her in the process. They went through a divorce, and she remarried in the temple to a liberal TBM. Six years ago she would have been the first person I would have called after I discovered the fraud, but I figured now she must have completely changed and I didn't want to make things weird between us.

We had a really great conversation, and I discovered that Patsy's been living the NOM (New Order Mormon) lifestyle, so I gave her a link to that board. This is how she keeps the peace with her parents and husband, but she has no problem enjoying a margarita or glass of wine. I know her parents quite well, and I completely understand and respect her decision. It was a huge relief to me to find out that she is the same person that I've always known and loved... not that I expected any different, but it was nice to have it confirmed.

Patsy and I have had some really good times together. There was the time we snuck out of our house to go to campus and participate in the "Rocky Horror Picture Show", because we knew our housemates wouldn't approve of our watching a rated R movie. There was also the time that we got 3 recent RM's to skinny dip with us in her parents swimming pool. She used to go with me to my music labs, and I would sit behind her in her 4 hour art classes to keep her company. She didn't care when I watched Melrose Place or 90210, and I got a kick out of watching Ghostbusters I & II with her on a weekly basis, while she quoted every.single.line.

She paid me the highest compliment... she said "When I found out about you, I was not shocked at all. You have always been so open minded and non-judgemental, so this is not surprising to me." She also made the comment that I was one of her only friends that didn't condemn her to hell when I found out she wasn't getting married in the temple.

Cheers to old friends! I gave Patsy a link to my blog... we'll see if she reads it! ;-)

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

"That was your big plan? Get her!"

Christy said...

"I like it, it was scientific."

Sister Mary Lisa said...

I'm sure she'll read your blog and like you even more, just like me.

:)

Regina Filangi said...

I love friends like that. Unfortunately my irl friends are the type of TBM's who won't even cook with alcohol let alone drink it. They would completely freak out if they found out about me. That's great that you have a good friend like that!

Christy said...

SML- How sweet are you?!?! I like you a lot, too! I've truly loved getting to know you!

Regina- I'm sorry your IRL friends are that way. I'll count myself lucky that so far, the friends that I've come out to are ridiculously cool!

Eric- "Yes. It's raining." My favorite line from that movie is "I see you shiver with antici... pation" (why have we never watched that movie?? We need to! In Rob and Shiree's basement, even!)

Bishop Rick said...

Christy,

Forgive my ignorance, but what is a new order mormon?

Christy said...

Bishop Rick, in Mormonism, thinking is black and white. You're hot or your cold, you're in or you're out. Many people realize the doctrinal issues of the church, but they choose to stay in for cultural and family reasons. The New Order Mormon's website supports the 3rd choice of the black or white issue: try New Order Mormons. If this link doesn't work, google it.

Anonymous said...

...okay, what movie are we talking about?

Whatever it is....come on over!!!

Christy said...

Geez Shiree, don't you love how I volunteer your house for watching movies? Only because of the bad ass setup you guys have. That and the love sac... ;-) Anyway, we were talking about Rocky Horror Picture Show. If we were really going to watch it, I think everyone should have to come in costume.

Eric, you're right, if we're sober then we'll probably actually watch the movie. But if I'm sober, I won't get up and do the time warp.

Anonymous said...

"I'm studying the effect of negative reinforcement on ESP ability."
"The effect? It's pissing me off!!"

Remember when I ran onstage to spin the globe? I'm sure that looked awesome, all backlit...

It was so good to reconnect. Finally, friends who are thinking for themselves and not afraid. I love you guys and am proud of who you are. We'll forever be in touch.

"I would like, if I may, to take you on a strange journey..."

Christy said...

Patsy, sweetie darling, it means the world that you visited my blog. There are very few people in the world that I hold in as high esteem as you. And you're right that we'll forever be in touch-- even if ends up pissing you off! :)

I do remember when you ran on stage to spin the globe... better yet, I remember when you attempted to run on stage to spin the globe but tripped on the way up! I still laugh uncontrollably when I think about that. Most of my all time favorite memories involve you!

"You can never have enough hats, gloves or shoes. Cheers cheers, thanks a lot!"