Last night I made a very long, overly detailed post about part IV of my relationship examination process. I posted it, shut down my computer, and got ready for bed. By the time I was done with my routine, I realized that I didn't like the vulnerable and exposed feeling I had. I didn't realize that publicly talking about my past relationships would bother me, but this time it did. Perhaps it spotlighted my faults in an all too real manner. Perhaps I realized that I haven't changed as much as I thought I have. Perhaps I'm pissed that all of the pain I experienced still hurts a little.
At any rate, I'm not able to talk about it anymore. The post was up for about a half hour, I think a few people already saw it.
skip to main |
skip to sidebar
I am part of a degenerate elite, dragging our society into the street
Google Analytics
About Me
Blogs I read
- A New Eric
- Adventures in Mediocrity
- Aerin's Cranberry Blog
- Belaja
- Darwin's Apostle (Dr. Ros)
- Dooce
- Eight Hour Lunch
- Equality Time
- Every Wrong Move
- Finding La
- Floating in the Milk
- From the Ashes
- Gluby
- Jer Illuminated
- Lemon Blossom
- Letters from a broad
- Miranda's Meanderings
- Post Secret
- Ramblings of a SAHM (Regina Filangi)
- Rip Zip
- Sideon's Sanctuary
- Sister Mary Lisa
- This, That, and The Other
- Thunderschops (Steve)
- Wry Catcher
Labels
- accomplishments (3)
- Art (3)
- Bloggiversary (1)
- Blogs I read (4)
- Boyfriend Application (3)
- Broken Heart (4)
- bunco (1)
- cake decorating (3)
- Christmas (8)
- Coffee (3)
- Commitment to being Healthy (6)
- Communication (2)
- Concerts (3)
- Current Relationships (1)
- Dancing (1)
- Dating (2)
- Daughters (17)
- Depression (13)
- different cultures (4)
- Dissaffection (7)
- Dooce (3)
- Dreams (3)
- Drinking (4)
- Embarrassment (4)
- Erotica (1)
- Family (2)
- Fears (4)
- First Blog Post Ever (1)
- Food (5)
- Friends (17)
- guilty pleasures (3)
- Haiku (5)
- halloween (6)
- Hillary (1)
- Human Behavior (1)
- Husband (4)
- JulieAnn (1)
- London (5)
- Lyrics (15)
- marriage (1)
- Meme's (1)
- Mormonism (17)
- Movies (5)
- Moving (1)
- Music (1)
- my Tatttoo's (1)
- New York (4)
- Parents (1)
- Past Relationships (12)
- photos (18)
- Poetry (2)
- Politics (3)
- Random Thoughts (36)
- real life gatherings (10)
- Recipes (3)
- Sexuality (2)
- Shopping (2)
- Social Activities (1)
- tag lists (4)
- Teen Idols (1)
- therapy (2)
- Things that I love (6)
- Things that must go (4)
- Trips (11)
- TV Shows (9)
- U2 (8)
- Women (1)
- Work (2)
- Wry Catcher (1)
8 comments:
I'm bummed I missed it. Would you email it to me? I'd love to read it.
Same here. I'd love to see it too. Of course that might defeat the purpose of keeping it to yourself...
:)
I can really relate to this Christy. I have posted the most vulnerable parts of my emotional self on my blog and there have been times when people have taken the cheap shots. But guess what? I'm still here. Mostly, I have received encouragement and empathy.
I am not advocating you do anything for which you are not ready; just know that in sharing the shadow parts of ourselves, they are brought into the light--thus the shadow has less power over us. It is a form of healing and self-acceptance that is profound and magical.
peace, sweets
From Joom: Come visit my new site!
:(
I understand Christy. I have a site that I won't let anyone I know IRL see, and even then, I deleted posts. I have decided not to post much on it anymore. I opened a new blog: Julie0Shields@blogspot.com (Come see me.)
I decided to keep posting occasionally, but I can't freely post because I worry about what I write, and who will read it and think less of me. It is better to be able to write and not feel judged by anyone, not even yourself.
I probably didn't make much sense, but I do understand your feeling vulnerable.
Did you figure out who I am? This name doesn't disguise me much LOL!
I think that sharing this type of thing with a few select people can be beneficial, but if it made me uncomfortable, I wouldn't post it, especially in light of what is going on with joom...maybe just the act of writing it provided all the needed benefit, if not, share with a confidant. Just my thoughts.
I understand. You do what you have to do. I've enjoyed the openness I've had on my blog--even when I show my faults and vulnerabilities. It's somehow freeing to present more of real me than to present only select The Best of Me. It's the post-modernist in my coming out, I guess.
That said, there are some things I never talk about on the blog. Like my relationship with my DH. That's OURS, not mine, to share or not share. So I understand.
Maybe when your relationship with Jer is longer past, it will be easier.
Post a Comment